Rejection

I'll admit it. I have an intense fear of rejection. So much that it is difficult for me to ask people if they would like to get together. I almost feel like a little girl begging another little girl to be my friend.

I've also had this issue in the online world. Take Facebook for instance. I've had a page there for 2 years. I didn't use it for the first year and a half and had actually forgotten that I had it when I got a friend request from a friend who has moved out of the area. I had been regretting not keeping in touch as well as I would have liked when she moved so I figured "why not?" and started using my facebook page. I even did an email search to add people already in my address book. The thing is, I only added people that I was pretty sure would "friend" me. You know, that old rejection fear kicking in. Slowly I added friends and, at times, someone would add me as well.

Then I found out about the classmate search feature. Gasp! I have not really kept in touch with anyone from high school. Do I really want to put my information on the page? What if nobody sends me a friend request? Worse yet, what if I send a friend request and am rejected? It took several months for me to get up the nerve to put my information on that page. Low and behold, some friend requests came in! I even sent a few out myself.

Why would a woman of 35 be so afraid of rejection? If we think about it, I think we all want to feel wanted, like we belong. We all want to feel like somebody cares. Sometimes it's easier to stay in our own little bubble and keep others out in order to avoid feeling that rejection.

So here is my challenge. I am going to reach out to people. I am going to extend myself and send requests to people that I may not have known well. Maybe I'll even send requests to people that I didn't get along with. I am going to make an effort to get to know people. If they agree then great! If they say no then it will be quick and painless. I won't even get a notification about it and can go on about my way like nothing ever happened.

And to those of you who reached out to me after all these years, thank you. I look forward to getting to know you again.